Happy Monday!
I say that now because it’s almost come to a close. I also say it because it was a rather happy day for me. Indeed, it took an incredibly eventual amount of time to get that way, but I found by starting the process yesterday it made for a better end of today. Discovery was the watchword of the day – which strangely broke the sixty-eight watchword reign of “loverly”, which had been stuck in my head since watching My Fair Lady just over two months ago.
I discovered the most eventual drink of all. The cocktail. And not just any cocktail. All of them.
For those of you who’ve followed me since the dawn of “in your own time”, you’re well aware of my love for the booze. While beer has been generally my drink of choice (other than Brain Toniq, of course), the only one that seems to take an eventual amount of time to pour is Guinness.* I also have enjoyed a glass of wine on occasion, but only the stuff that’s been really aged. All my alcohol needs to be properly eventualized before consumption.
However, I had no idea the craft and art behind the making of a cocktail. The reason it appeals to me is that I can see it being made before my eyes and yet cannot have a sip of it until it is properly mixed, shaken, stirred, hokey-pokeyed, turned itself around and garnished. That preparation time is not so eventually fascinating that it also becomes fascinatingly eventual without one even knowing it. Once you get a taste of the concoction, you’ll know exactly why the eventual nature of the process makes the cocktail what it is. I’ve decided that the cocktail is to an Eventualist what sacramental wine is to Catholics – only with far better taste and a little less guilt.
Truth be told, I don’t know much about cocktails. That’s not going to stop me from pretending that I do, but I felt that having a little more back story is always helpful. So I began to research by having Xerxes begin to research. A simple Google search brought up a gentleman named Art Of The Cocktail, who clearly is the man I had to talk to to gain the slight amount of knowledge I needed on the subject to pass muster. I mean, he was Art Of The Cocktail – he had to know as much about cocktails as the Earl of Sandwich had to know about sandwiches.
Turns out Art of The Cocktail isn’t actually a man. In fact, he isn’t even a person, which makes it even more impossible for him to be a he or him. What Art Of The Cocktail happens to be is a fundraiser for The Victoria Film Festival, and it’s a multi-day (multi meaning two) festival running November 7th and 8th that will teach me quite a bit about the cocktail. I can learn about its history, how to make cocktails with fresh ingredients, watch some of the best mixologists in action (which I thought was just a fancy word for DJ, but isn’t – at least not here) and tons of other info that I can’t get anywhere else in one place in the city where I live. I can even watch a competition between some of the best mixologists out there as they vye for the title of Best Mixologist of the Pacific Northwest. I’m not sure what that means, but it sounds important.
Better still, The Thirsty Traveler will be there! He’s the most eventual “imbiber” I’ve heard of, as he travels the globe quenching his thirst with no end in sight that I can tell.
The best part about this whole event is The Tastings. I can buy a ticket (sorry, Eventualists…no delaying on this as they MUST be purchased in advance) and gain admittance to a world of spirits that would rival the amount of spirits Ricky Gervais encountered in Ghost Town. I’ll eventually make my way through each sampling table until I’ve tried everything there is to offer. Sure, the samples are a buck apiece…but I’ve been saving that roll of loonies for a rainy day anyway. Rain or shine during the Art Of The Cocktail, for me it’s going to be pouring!
The best part is that all of my imbibing is a far better way for me to donate to The Victoria Film Festival then by me bribing them to screen The NeverEnding Story at a future event. It’s also far less painful for everyone involved.
Cocktail culture has been making inroads for a while now – even my idol, Mr. Colbert, has a signature cocktail - and I’m fashionably late to the party. You all know I wouldn’t have it any other way. Straight up.
(In the interest of full disclosure, there is a Mike Vardy that works for the Victoria Film Festival, and it’s probably me.)*Corollary: It’s a little-documented fact, that the world records are named after the beer because the beer itself holds the record for the longest amount of time to pour. In fact, I’m the only one to have documented it.
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